| Character |
Episode |
Quote |
Conclusion |
| Ross |
6.15 |
Hey! There are some men who will do whatever it takes to make their marriage work! Okay? There are some men who will stand by and-and watch as their wives engage in what only can be described as a twosome with some woman she barely knows from the gym! |
Ross just realised that Carol is a lesbian |
| Chandler |
3.14 |
Just had me a little nubbin-ectomy. Yep! Two nipples, no waiting. |
Chandler had surgery to remove his third "nipple" and this is how he describes the operation. |
| Chandler |
5.15 |
Hey listen, come on, Joey is having a problem! A little girl is beating him up. |
Joey's having problems with his girlfriend hitting him and Chandler can't resist making fun of him. |
| Ross |
6.14 |
Something could’ve happened. All right? She really dug my slides. And she was definitely giving me the vibe. |
Ross is talking to Rachel after meeting with her sister Jill. |
| Phoebe |
6.12 |
Ahh, remember the days when you used to go out to the barn, lift up your shirt, and bend over? |
Phoebe, the master of surprises! :) |
| Chandler |
6.08 |
Hi, my name’s Chandler. I just moved in next door and I was wondering if you would be interested in battling me in a post-apoplectic world for control of the galaxies last remaining energy source? |
Usually you say hello, but come on this is Chandler.. :) |
| Rachel |
5.07 |
He hasn't called me since that one time when we went out. I see him in the hallway, we flirt, I'm all ha-ha-ha-ha, and nothing. |
Rachel talking about dating Danny, the downstairs neighbour. |
| Rachel |
6.06 |
'Oh my God, I can't find a boyfriend! So I guess I'll just stumble across the hall and sleep with the first guy I find in there!' |
Rachel and Monica are trying to find annoying things about each other during an argument and Rachel makes up this "Monica-thing".. Quite a good one to.. :) |
| Ross |
2.16 |
I don't think mom and dad would mind. Remember when you were 9 and Richard was 30, how dad used to say, 'God I hope they get together.' |
Ross's thoughts on Monica and Richard's relationship.. |
| Chandler |
3.02 |
You know what's wierd? Donald Duck never wore pants. But whenever he's getting out of the shower, he always puts a towel around his waist. I mean, what is that about? |
Chandler thinks to much.. |
| Ross |
5.23 |
Okay Rach, before anything happens, I just want to lay down a couple of ground rules. This is just about tonight. I don't to go through with this if it's going to raise the question of "Us." Okay? I just want this to be about what it is! |
Ross sees Rachel naked in her apartment and he thinks that she wants to have sex with him. |
| Phoebe |
1.24 |
OK, we've got the ground-up flesh of formerly cute cows and turkeys, ew... |
This one could make anyone of us feel bad for eating meat. |
| Chandler |
1.23 |
Dear God! This parachute is a knapsack! |
Chandler is trying to save the situation after, once again, talking to much. |
| Chandler |
2.06 |
What kind of scary-ass clowns came to your birthday? |
Chandler's witty comeback when Joey says 'ducks is heads, because ducks have heads' during a coin-flip. |
| Rachel |
1.18 |
I cannot be a waitress anymore, I mean it. I'm sick of the lousy tips, I'm sick of being called 'Excuse me...' |
Rachel is applying for a new job.. |
| Rachel |
5.18 |
My dad's a doctor and he would always tell me these horror stories....... about ghosts and goblins who totally supported the princess's right to smoke. |
Rachel is trying to save the situation, after her co'workers asks her if she smokes. :) |
| Chandler |
5.16 |
Whoa! What if Martin Luther King had said that? 'I kinda have a dream! I don’t want to talk about it'. |
Joey had a dream about him and Monica and he doesn't want to talk about it.. This gives Chandler a golden opportunity to make fun of him. |
| Phoebe |
508 |
Well, of course it smells really bad. You have your head up a dead animal. |
Joey got a turkey stuck on his head. |
| Monica |
122 |
Oh god, oh god. I´m like those women that you see with shiny guys like Chad. I´m Joan Collins. |
Monica's date is a senior i High school, and she's a bit upset about it. |
| Phoebe |
506 |
This is fashion?!... Okay, so to you, death is fashion?! That's really funny. Here's Phoebe umm, sporting uh, y'know, cutting edge hairy carcass from y'know, the steal traps of wintry Russia. I mean, you really think this looks good? (Sees herself in the mirror) 'Cause I do. |
The pet-lover struck again... :) |
| Ross |
519 |
Hey! Oh, we can't keep eating like this. |
Ross is trying to flirt with the cute pizza-delivery girl, doing well? NOT.. |
| Joey |
311 |
All right, that’s it! He cannot do this to Phoebe. (gets up) This guy is going to get the butt kicking of a lifetime! ............ But, is he a big guy? |
One thing Joey, think BEFORE you speak.. :) |
| Monica |
101 |
There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with! |
This was the very first line on Friends and it aired on September 24th 1994. |
| Rachel |
518 |
It's not that bad, y'know? I mean yeah, my tongue feels a little fuzzy and these fingers sort of smell, I actually feel like I can throw up. |
Rachel tries to smoke at work and she really hates it. |
| Ross |
423 |
I Ross take thee Rachel... |
A huge mistake by Ross.. |
| Chandler |
517 |
Monica, you have got to stop this competitive thing! Okay? It's crazy. I mean, just to impress Gary and Phoebe we have to go upstairs and have sex over and over and I'm saying no to this, ...why? Get your coat. |
Well, nice try Chandler... :) |
| Monica |
209 |
Hey, it's Funny's cousin, Not Funny. |
Monica's upset about the radiator that just broke and Ross gets hit with this comment. |
| Chandler |
214 |
Well, I don't know what Big Leon told ya but it's an even thousand if you want me for the whole night. |
Joey gives Chandler some money and he cannot resist joking about it. |
| Rachel |
109 |
Excuse me, sir. I was just wondering, do you think there's a possibility that you could give me an advance on my tips? |
Rachel wants to go skiing with her parents, unfortunately she's broke and tries this to get some extra money. |
| Chandler |
113 |
Oh look, it's the woman we ordered. |
Chandler & Joey are coming out of Monica's apartment, when they see a woman sitting next to the door. (The woman is Joey Sr's mistress) |
| Ross |
305 |
Ah, the heart of every healthy relationship. Honesty, respect, and sex with celebrities. |
Ross comments on Chandler and Janice's "healthy" relationship. |
| Ross |
110 |
I think you reach a certain age, having a roommate is kinda pathe...... [Realises]. sorry, that's 'pathet', which is Sanskrit for 'really cool way to live'. |
Ross's hates living alone and the gang tries to convince him to get a roommate. |
| Joey |
508 |
It's not so much an underpant as it is a feat of engineering. I mean, it's amazing how much they can do with so little material! And the way they play with your mind! Is it there? Is it not there? |
Joey's talking about thongs. |
| Phoebe |
209 |
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Ugly Naked Guy is decorating his tree. Oh my God, you should see the size of his Christmas Balls. |
The Friends have themselves quite an entertaining neighbour. |
| Chandler |
122 |
Well, you know Phoebs. I don´t know if it´s your kinda thing, because it involves a lot of being normal. For a large portion of the day. |
Chandlers secretary is having her boobies reduced and Phoebe wants to fill in for her.. |
| Chandler |
110 |
Hey, that monkey's got a Ross on its ass! |
Chandlers says this when he sees Marcel, sitting on Ross's shoulder. |
| Chandler |
204 |
Why yes Ross, pressing my third nipple opens the delivery entrance to the magical land of Narnia. |
Chandler gets defensive about his "nubbin". |
| Chandler |
120 |
Oh, no no no no. Last time I left a spontaneous message I ended up using the phrase 'Yes indeedy-o' |
Chandler on why he hangs up when getting a woman's answering machine. |
| Rachel |
316 |
A mistake?! What were you trying to put it in? Her purse?! |
Rachel's answer to Ross when he claims that sleeping with Chloe was a huge mistake. |
| Rachel |
113 |
Chandler Bing? It's time to see your thing. |
Rachel is about to have a glance of Chandler in the shower. Need I tell you that Joey's the one she sees. |
| Chandler |
502 |
Y'know what else I can't believe? I had to kiss Phoebe and Rachel every time I left a room, I mean it's too bad they didn't see us having sex. |
Chandler, the king of wishful thinking.. :) |
| Jack Geller |
423 |
Hey, you keep pushing me on this, my foot's going to meet the middle of your ass. |
Emily's father tries to make Jack pay for his wine cellar and Jack gets pretty mad.. |
| Ross |
515 |
This is fun. Hey Rach, remember that whole "We were on a break thing?" Well, I'm sorry, will you marry me? |
Ross is trying to make a joke.. Unfortunately no-one laughs.. :) |
| Ross |
107 |
Passion is way overrated. Eventually, it kind of burns out. But hopefully, what you're left with is trust and security, and... well, in the case of my ex-wife, lesbianism. |
Ross is trying to explain to Rachel about the wonders of being in love.. :) |
| Chandler |
511 |
Pheebs? Flying a jet? Better make it a spaceship so that you can get back to your home planet! And Ross, phone call for you today, Tom Jones, he wants his pants back And Hornswoggle? What are you dating a character from Fraggle Rock?! |
Ross & Chandler makes a bet that Chandler can keep from making fun of the gang during a whole year.. But he failes after just a day or two. |
| Rachel |
201 |
When I saw him get off that plane with her, I really thought I hit rock bottom. But today, it's like there's rock bottom, then 50 feet of crap, then me. |
Rachel is explaining to Joey how she felt when Julie got of the plane with Ross.. |
| Chandler |
508 |
It's a tradition, like the parade. If the parade decided it was gay, moved out, and abandoned its entire family. |
Chandler is telling everybody for the hundredth time, why he doesn't like thanksgiving.. 'More turkey Mr Chandler'.. :) |
| Joey |
509 |
I'm Joey. Yeah, I'm disgusting, I take my underwear off in other people's homes. |
Rachel finds a pair of underwear on the couch and Joey's trying to keep Chandler & Monicas love-affair a secret... |
| Joey |
113 |
It's like if you woke up one day and found out your dad was leading this double life. He's like actually some spy, working for the CIA. [Considers] That'd be cool.... This blows! |
Joey's upset about his dad having an love-affair.. |
| Ross |
113 |
Hey, I married a lesbian to make you look good! |
Phoebe's dating a shrink named Roger, and he has a theory about Ross´ failed marriage.. |
| Chandler |
214 |
Oh this is excellent. You know he could've gotten me a VCR, he could've gotten me a set of golf clubs, but no, he has to get me the woman repeller, the eyesore from the Liberace house of crap. |
Joey bought Chandler a bracelet, but he REALLY didn't like it.. :) |
| Chandler |
103 |
Hey, y'know, I have had it with you guys and your cancer and your emphysema and your heart disease. The bottom line is, smoking is cool, and you know it. |
Chandler... Need I say more?? |
| Gunther |
318 |
Oh dark mother, once again I suckle at your smokey tit. |
"Smoking is cool and you know it..." |
| Frank Jr |
503 |
Chandler is a girl!! |
I will never forget Chandlers facial expression when Frank says/screams this. |
| Joey |
224 |
Can you believe that, me not a good kisser, that's like, like Mother Theresa, not a good mother. |
There's nothing wrong with Joeys' self-confidence. |
| Joey |
501 |
Hey, no matter what happens with Ross and Emily, we still get cake right? |
Joey's always hungry. |
| Gunther |
319 |
(In his head) Say Rachel, I was wondering if you’d like to go to a movie with me sometime. As my lover! Nnnsch, to out there. Maybe you’d just like to ah, get something to eat with me sometime? As my lover. |
This is the first "Gunther-quote" I've had. Thanks to Pär Eriksson for the idea. |
| Chandler |
309 |
You hear that! That is her choose, mister I’ll let you have her! I win! You suck! I rule all! A mini-wave in celebration of me!! |
Another one of Chandler's greatest.. |
| Phoebe |
417 |
Oh my God!! So I mean, so in a few months I’m going to have three full grown babies just walkin’ around inside me?! Oh! Oh! And it’s gonna be one of those log rides where they just come shooting out! |
Don't you just love Phoebe?! |
| Monica |
101 |
Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and not having sex. |
One may wonder what Monica does on a "real" date.. |
| Chandler |
113 |
It was an accident. Not like I was across the street with a telescope and a box of donuts. |
After seeing Rachel's breasts, Chandler is trying to convince the gang that it was an accident. |
| Chandler |
101 |
All right, kids, I gotta get to work. If I don't input those numbers,... it doesn't make much of a difference... |
Chandler really enjoys his work with all the responsibility that comes with it..!! :) |
| Chandler |
102 |
I think for us, kissing is pretty much like an opening act, y'know? I mean it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floyd comes in. |
Great metaphor Chandler. :() |
| Ross |
101 |
I'm supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little worm guys. I have no brackety thing, I see no worm guys whatsoever and- I cannot feel my legs. |
Ross is assembling his new furniture, I'm guessing IKEA. |
| Monica |
406 |
Probably the only time I'll ever say this, but did you see the ass on her? |
Monica's reaction when she sees Ross's new girlfriend, who is played by supermodel Rebecca Romijn. |
| Chandler |
315 |
Hey, this isn’t like swimming after you eat, pick up the phone!! |
Chandler says this when Ross is thinking about not calling up Rachel after a huge fight. |
| Joey |
217 |
I figured I'd have like, time alone with my thoughts but, ya know, it turns out I don't have as many thoughts as you'd think. |
Joey's thoughts on living alone in his new apartment. |
| Monica |
404 |
Hey-hey, how goes the dancing? Gay yet? |
Monica says this to make fun of Joey who's dancing with Mr Treeger to keep him from throwing Mon and Rach out on the street. |
| Chandler |
407 |
Yeah, I know what you’re thinkin’! Yes, yes, your breasts are just as firm and juicy. |
Chandler says this when he's watching Yasmine Bleeth (Baywatch) running on TV, and the duck starts quacking. |
| Chandler |
107 |
Oh, then no thanks. What the hell was that? Mental note: If Jill Goodacre offers you gum, you take it. If she offers you mangled animal carcass, you take it. |
Chandler's answer and thoughts when Jill Goodacre offers him a stick of gum. (this quote is one of my favourites) |
| Chandler |
403 |
When I walk outside naked people throw garbage at me. |
Chandler makes this comment when he is "breaking up" with Rachel's boss Joanna. |
| Chandler |
307 |
Whoa - whoa, somebody missed the offramp. |
Chandler makes this golden comment when he enters Monica's room and takes notice of her new race car bed. |
| Monica |
408 |
Fine! Judge all you want to but, married a lesbian, left a man at the altar, fell in love with a gay ice dancer, threw a girl’s wooden leg in a fire, livin’ in a box!! |
The gang is making fun of Monica who has a date with a guy who just happens to be Richard Burke's son. ewww |
| Joey |
415 |
Dude, you’re not even man enough to order the channel that carries the sport. |
Joey's pointing out that Ross isn't capable of playing Rugby. (You can see where he got that from :)) |
| Chandler |
204 |
No, no the gravel capades. Yeah, the turns aren't as fast but when Snoopy falls... funny. |
Chandler is making fun of Joey.. (As usual) |
| Ross |
423 |
Okay! Okay! That’s it!! Parents!! Parents!! Back away!! All right, this is our wedding day! From now on everyone gets along, and if I hear one more word. NO GRANDCHILDREN! (Pointing at his mother.) That’s right!! |
Ross is trying to keep his and Emily´s parents from fighting. |
| Phoebe |
104 |
Oh, wait, she's walking across the floor.. she's walking.. she's walking.. she's going for the pizza- (YELLS) Hey, that's not for you, bitch! |
Phoebe, Rachel and Monica are spying on George Stephanopoulos and girlfriend. |
